The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University works towards advancing sexual health and knowledge worldwide.
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Sexual health & wellness is relevant to everyone!
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Issues around sexuality can be difficult for some to discuss–because they can be personal and because there is a great mixture in how they are perceived and approached. Sexual health & wellness impact your health and life as a whole, which means that it's time to begin a mature thoughtful discussion about sexuality.
My name is Jamie Harris and I’m a certified Life, Wellness & Sexual Health Coach. I’ve known that sexual health is a major part of your health in general; it’s just as important as your physical health!
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The World Health and CDC defines sexual health as a state of physical, emotional, mental and social well-being in relation to sexuality.
Circle of Life Women’s Center is an OB/GYN with a full range of services for women’s health care.
One of the most common sexual complaints among women is a lack of the desire for sex. Despite it being very common, it is a problem that many women suffer in silence.
We live in a time of theoretically open communication about sex, however a survey of adults over the age of 25, revealed that 71% believed their health-care provider would dismiss any sexual concerns they might bring up, and about 68% avoided discussing sexual problems because they were embarrassed.
People just simply don’t know where to turn for help with sexual problems, concerns or questions.
One of the main differences between men and women with sex is the time it takes to reach climax… to climb the mountain to the euphoric bliss when orgasm is achieved.
Women generally agree that it seems like men have a little mole hill to climb while women face Mt. McKinley!
The average man takes around 2 minutes to climax while the average woman takes around 20! (OR a little less with continual stimulation and a steady and consistent rhythm pattern… so let’s be serious… 20 minutes is more realistic right??)
Think about this… In order to achieve climax you have to have a good blood flow pumping through the genitals. Men carry a good amount of blood flow in their genitals all the time. Women on the other hand… carry large amounts of blood flow in our heart and our mind, which means it takes longer to get the blood flow pumping in the erogenous zones.
The trouble is… most women pride themselves in doing it all. Somehow, we dedicate 100% of our hearts & minds to our families, work, community... We are organized, smart, nurturing, generous... We are well informed about how to manage finances, cook chicken in 220 different ways, write an amazing résumé, and be the best parent who ever lived.
What we tend to overlook however, is becoming as well informed as possible about our private concerns: our mental, physical and sexual health. Thankfully YOU have taken an important step in empowering yourself to take control of your health and happiness by reading this. You can take it a step further by setting up your appointment to talk about things a bit more specific to you.
Having respect for the diversity of attitudes, culture, beliefs, values, opinions and in finding common ground with sexual health might not seem so easy but it is definitely realistic and sought after. We are more likely to find this common ground through honest, respectful and open communication… so thank you for having an open mind and I’m glad you have a thirst for a better understanding and respect for your sexual health and wellness AND hopefully walk away with a smile on your face and a goal to enjoy your health, happiness and sexuality!
I recently celebrated 16 years of educating women on sexual health and well being in a professional manner in group settings and also offer advice and information one-on-one.
This has opened up the door for me to learn and to research more issues that individuals & couples are faced with.
It’s humbling to be reminded of the sheer diversity… and in turn to bring understanding, hope, information and a range of possibilities to others so they can have a healthy fulfilling sex life!
The Circle of Life Women’s Center understands that the hunger for trustworthy information that is clear and easy to understand is a great resource to offer to the community, patients, couples struggling with certain issues, as well as women that are thirsty for more knowledge and understanding… through personal one-on-one coaching appointments, women can become more informed and gain an understanding of general sexual wellbeing.
Sexual health & wellness is relevant for EVERYONE, even those that choose abstinence and those who haven’t yet had partnered sex. I’ve learned a lot over the years from researching and teaching women about this subject… plus many years of learning from sexuality trainings, workshops, conferences and classes I’ve attended.
According to experts, Sexual Health is a state of physical, emotional, mental and social well being in relation to sex, relationships and well-being. Sexual health requires a positive and respectful approach to sexuality and sexual relationships, as well as the possibility of having pleasurable and safe sexual experiences.
Regular contact, especially with a committed partner helps to keep your body and brain healthy. Men & women need touching, eye contact, and sexual connection to stay healthy. When you feel loved, nurtured, cared for, supported, and intimate, you are much more likely to be happier and healthier all around.
Sex is one of the most powerful drives motivating behavior. It is a natural part of being alive, of being human and it is healthy & completely natural to want to express yourself.
In SEX ON THE BRAIN- Dr. Daniel G. Amen it says
Even though it feels genital, the vast majority of love and sex occurs in the brain. Your brain decides who is attractive to you, how to get a date, how well you do on the date, what to do with the feelings that develop, how long those feelings last, when to commit, and how well you do as a partner. Your brain helps you be enthusiastic in the bedroom or drains you of desire and passion.
Thoughtful sexual activity with a committed partner improves well-being by enhancing longevity, immune system function, joy, pain management, and sexual & reproductive health. A common mistake, is that we want to rest, relax and take time for our sexuality –but only AFTER everything else in our lives is perfect.
Have you ever thought to yourself: I will spend more time on my marriage when the kids are in college. I will devote myself to my own needs once my finances are more settled. I will get into shape when the children go to school –the list is endless! What are you waiting for? What personal happiness or fulfillment are you delaying for perfection? Now is the ABSOLUTE BEST time to seek your own happiness!
What does this mean? It means you don’t need to be thinner and more toned to have a fantastic sex life. Do NOT delay your happiness until some non-existent utopia finds you. This means finding time to reconnect with the man or woman you used to be – the one your partner fell in love with. Make time for old interests and hobbies. Look at photographs of yourself and your partner and reminisce about when you first met & make the effort to spend a little time each day connecting.
In REAL SEX FOR REAL WOMEN- Dr. Laura Berman PhD
There is a little section on “Making Time for Sex” that says How often have you collapsed into bed and fallen asleep exhausted? Not from a night of passion but rather from a day filled with running around and trying to take care of everything you need to do?
For women especially, achieving a fulfilling sex life is about finding time: time to be intimate with your lover, time for yourself, and time to think about what you want from your sex life. To reinvigorate your relationship, try reassessing your priorities and making time to let sexiness flourish in your life.
The lack of sleep, stress and a busy lifestyle can cause many women to experience fatigue, weight gain, moodiness, and low sex drive. So the next time you’re running crazy all day, don’t be surprised if when you head to bed, your sexiness doesn’t show up!
Tuning into your sexuality and having a healthy sex life is vital to your well-being. Gaining a better understanding of your sexuality can lead you to pleasure, confidence, and a fulfilling, intimate relationship with your lover. Celebrate sex, and celebrate your health!